Kyrie Irving decided to hop on Channing Frye and Richard Jefferson’s podcast last week, and oh boy did he drop some hot takes. Amongst other things, he claimed the Earth is flat, the moon landing was faked, dinosaur never existed and that the education system is designed to lie to us. This man is woke as shit, he’s connecting dots we didn’t even know existed.

Now I’m all for a good conspiracy theory, but Kyrie is putting his support behind all the worst conspiracies out there. Give me a good 9/11, Gucci Mane clone, or Illuminati theory, not this flat Earth nonsense. When I can definitively disprove your conspiracy, it’s no fun at all. But the conspiracy that the post-prison Gucci Mane we’re seeing now is a clone? Now that’s something I can get behind. 

The most wild part about this flat Earth theory, though, is that other NBA players have come to his defense! Draymond tweeted back in 2010 that “the world is flat fool”, and honestly I respect the arrogance here. Not only is the world flat but you’re an idiot for thinking otherwise, that’s the kind of attitude I like to see when you connect the dots. 

Then LeBron came in with the nonsense “if he decides the Earth is flat, that’s ok”. Are you serious? You literally shamed Tristan Thompson into breaking up with Khloe Kardashian earlier this season and you’re not willing to put the kibosh on this? Kyrie is out here talking like he wears a tinfoil hat and invested his first paycheck in an apocalypse bunker.  

And has anyone introduced Kyrie to the NBA conspiracy theories yet? The guy would have a damn field day with the “NBA is rigged” conspiracies from the David Stern Era. This is a gold mine waiting to happen. Make it happen, LeBron.