Good ol’ Tiger found himself in a bit of a predicament this holiday weekend, as he was booked for a DUI early Monday morning. A normal person would reasonably think that this is the  final nail in the coffin in his return that has seemingly had no time table for years now, but personally I think this little incident can get him right back on track.
We all know Tiger was in his finest form while he was giving into his vices, and this is a perfect kick in the pants to get Tiger back focused on golf after a spinal fusion that has left him feeling “instant nerve relief”. Hell, why not completely embrace the persona and give John Daly some competition as the wild card on tour. John’s been slugging Miller Lites for 4 decades and he’s coming off another tour victory at age 51. 

As Donnie Trump taught us, exercising is overrated and the body is basically a Duracell battery, and if that’s true Tiger has to completely abandon the habit if he wants to see 50. Nothing would be more entertaining than seeing an overweight Eldrick Woods pull out another major victory in his Sunday red.

But for the love of god someone please get a hat back on that man, I don’t need to see that hairline again.