Vlad Jr’s Kryptonite is Clearly White Sox Pitching

Vlad Jr's Kryptonite is Clearly White Sox Pitching 1

Unless you live under a rock, you’ve heard the news by now – Vlad Jr (Vladimir Guerrero Jr for the clueless), MLB’s number 1 prospect thanks to a Destroy Eloy Ponzi scheme, hit his first two career home runs earlier this week. And boy, did MLB’s accounts on twitter.com make sure everyone heard about them.

Not real sure where this fanfare was when Eloy literally did the same exact thing on a bigger stage in New York City on a Friday night?

OK fine, I’m big enough to admit that these are absolute moon shots. It’s 2019 after all. Vlad Jr got all of these, and despite the low slash line of .207/.303/.638 thus far, he’s been absolutely destroying the ball, in terms of Statcast. At this point, he already has 2 of the top 12 hardest hit balls in the MLB this year.

Vlad Jr's Kryptonite is Clearly White Sox Pitching 2
Vlad Jr's Kryptonite is Clearly White Sox Pitching 3

Especially for a rookie, Vlad Jr has impressive numbers compared to the rest of baseball. Surely, the traditional stats will follow.

However, around all this hoopla and pomp and circumstance, something happened that no one in the national media is talking about – the White Sox pitching staff has completely shut down Vlad Jr. Funny how that gets overlooked. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the game logs yourself.

Vlad Jr's Kryptonite is Clearly White Sox Pitching 4

That’s right, Mr. Superstar Vlad Jr is hitting 3-16 (.188) in 4 games against the Sox this year, with no RBI’s, no HR’s, no runs. Whole lot of nothing. So clearly, the White Sox pitching staff is so dominant the player that is the greatest prospect of all time, as MLB would have you believe, can’t even touch them. Maybe it’s the natural talent, maybe it’s Coop, who knows. All I know is numbers never lie – ask the stats people themselves.

To be fair, Vlad Jr is still hitting the ball hard against the White Sox.

This proves a few things:

  1. White Sox pitchers know Vlad Jr can absolutely unload on the ball, proving they read scouting reports to a T
  2. White Sox position players likewise are extremely well versed in scouting knowing where to play
  3. Said pitchers know exactly where to put the ball so it either goes foul or goes right at said fielders.

This is clearly a cerebral team we’re dealing with that knows how to get hitters out. Rick Hahn did it again!

What it all boils down to, and what I’m really driving at here, is that the White Sox pitching staff as a whole owns Vlad Jr. Clearly, they are taking up a ton of real estate in his head and he can’t figure out the nasty stuff or the high level defensive positioning. Barring an uptick in #BanTheShift support, I logically expect this trend to continue for time immemorial*.

*in the event it does not continue, do not cite this article as a cold take plz

Just wait til Kopech is back, Rodon is at full health, Cease is up, etc. Oh my is the golden boy Vlad Jr in trouble then. Maybe a stint down in Buffalo would do him some good…



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